Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Early morning babble...

"Typical LoliClown morning routine." 
I just got back from dosing at the clinic, and picking up Gatorade for my love at the store, and I'm sitting here enjoying my morning cigarette and coffee, taking my morning injections, watching the news, and planning out my day. My love is still incredibly ill, as am I, so I really don't know how much I can actually get done under these circumstances, but I will try my best. I was a bit uneasy when I first woke up, and I still feel a bit off, but am finally starting to calm down now that I have my cigarette and coffee. If it doesn't go away within the next hour or so, I may pop a Xanax or two, just to get through the morning hustle. Fortunately, for me, anyway, it's going to be a lot cooler today than it was yesterday. It's cloudy, and there's a thick drizzle outside, so I have the window open to let the nice, cool, damp, air in. It smells wonderful, and offers a certain kind of calm that I can't get anywhere else. I'm hoping this will be enough to calm me down so I won't need to pop any Xanax, but, we'll see. Hot weather makes me incredibly irritable, uncomfortable, and makes me ill by driving my blood pressure up, so this is a very welcome change of weather, especially because we're in the middle of the Summer months. They're on the weather segment of the news, and are saying that we should also expect some thunder and lightening later in the day. I really hope they're right, because I absolutely ADORE thunder and lightening! It's so beautiful, and such an amazing thing to behold in my opinion. So, I likely have that to look forward to later on- I'm keeping my paws crossed.
I'm hoping my stomach will let me eat something today, because I'm incredibly weak, and noticeably anemic now- my gums, tongue, finger nails, and under my eyelids are white, indicating a drop in red blood cells, meaning, simply, anemia. When I pricked my finger with a lancet earlier to check my blood glucose, I barely bled at all, so I ended up pricking it a total of seven times before I got enough blood for a reading- so annoying. I hate anemia. I used to follow a vegan diet, which I loved how it made me feel overall, until I dropped under 95lbs (6.7 stone for my non-American readers), and was diagnosed with absolute iron deficiency anemia. With that diagnoses, I was told that my body currently cannot handle a vegan diet, much to my dismay. Luckily, I don't have to eat meat every single day, just twice a week is sufficient according to the doctor, but it's hard to meet even that requirement with the gastroparesis because I can barely even keep liquids down on a bad day! The whole thing is super annoying, and I hate it... not to mention the excruciating pain it causes, but that's a whole other story that I don't want to get into right now.  Yesterday, all I could keep down was coffee, tea, and water, so that's why I'm in my current position, so I'm hoping today will be better, and that I can eat. So far, my coffee and medications are staying down fine, so I'm off to a good start.
Anyway, I'm off to go take a shower, write my shopping lists for the day, and run errands. I want to get as much done as possible in these early morning hours before much of the world is up. I'll likely be back later to write about my day.

~xoxo LoliClown 

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